La Primera Vista

I woke up and attempted to gain focus. Where in the world was I? I heard murmuring that I could not comprehend. I dressed and wondered what I should do next. I peeped out the metal door and discovered a room full of happenings. The table was packed with people, others where standing, and still more milling around filling up the table with food. Even though I was completely awake at this point, I still did not understand what was going on or what was being said. Everyone was chattering in a language that I had come to that place to learn: Spanish. I was introduced to each face around the table one-by-one, being told I was going to be given a quiz later. I acted like I got each one down, but I really had no idea what any of them where named. I had meet a couple of them, including the only two girls, the night before. The rest remained a mystery. As soon as they ate, they all left and suddenly the house was empty with the exception of the aging couple who lived there. I had no idea what to do, so I began to clear dishes, but I was told to leave them for later. A young couple with three young kids, including a baby showed up and we all pilled into the Suburban. We drove a little ways, then started up a mountain side. On the way up we picked up walkers, offering them a ride to top. A small church building with hundreds of people gathered around the outside waited for us at the top.

A wedding.

I offered to hold the baby. I had always used them as security blankets when I did not want any attention but on me. Plus this one was sweet and hardly cried. Someone a few feet away caught my attention. One of the guys who had eaten at the house that morning…oh what was his name? Who knew. I certainly didn’t. He clapped his hands together, then held out his arms, indicating that he wanted the baby. I shook my head with a resolved “No!". No way was he taking my security blanket... I was quite content as I was.

Little did I know that young man would steal my heart and in a little under 16 months later he would be taking me as his bride.

My Journal: January 2, 2011

The glass windows are fogged over with early morning dew as the bells rock back and forth.

Ding Dong. Ding Dong. Ding Dong.

Soon they die down as the stillness of morning seeps in. Deep breathing from sleep comes from the other room. There is no other sound than the rhythmic clicking of the keyboard.
Sleep has alluded me since the wee hours of the morning when I slipped on my shoes, attempted with no avail to quietly open the metal door that leads outside, finding my way to the bathroom in the glow of the light that steeps into the courtyard from the street.
Yet again a time has come in my life in which I jump into the unknown....this next phase of my life has many a question mark in my mind and I long for the answers. But yet again they are not mine to have. I have waited and waited to see this happen, to take this step, or rather to be lead there... and I am walking, running, towards it with joy.
Tomorrow I marry my amor. I become his and he becomes mine. A commitment for a lifetime and a love for eternity. I will accept a privilege that God made only for me...being the wife of Rafael Diaz Carrera.